Stories

Tollbooth.


More of a vignette than an actual short story.  I love the idea of someday doing this though.  Just upping and leaving.
Words: 370

The car drew up to the tollbooth.  It had been half an hour since the last had passed and Brenner had begun to doze off.  He was just thinking of getting a cup of coffee to keep the eyelids raised when she drew up.

The car was a glowing red Smartcar, matching its ponytailed, bright-eyed owner like a horse sometimes fits its rider.  The circles under her eyes did little to harm her fresh, youthful beauty, and her lips were set in a small but specific smile as she leaned over to get out the fare from her purse.

Brenner was struck suddenly by her.  What was it about her? He couldn’t tell.  It made him think of some small flower, growing in the cracks at the end of a concrete lot.  Tiny and yet brave.  He noticed the bags and boxes in the back.  “Hullo,” he said, “pretty late at night to be going about shifting isn’t it?”

For a second, the woman stared at him, confused.  Then she glanced back over her shoulder at the boxes.  “Oh right.  Yes. But then there’s no knowing when a notion will strike a body, is there?”

Brenner nodded. “Aye.  Though I wouldn’t think you’re the kind to follow up on any random notion.”

She laughed again, a fresh laugh, a beautiful one.  “I didn’t think so either.  At least not until now.  But…well, its never too late to make a change for the better, is it?”

Her voice was light, trusting, lilting with genuine enthusiasm.  Again old Brenner felt that piercing of something like compassion and respect.  Again he thought of the little flower, yearning against all odds to do its little bit, to make the world a more beautiful place.  With an honest smile he handed her back her coins and looked her in the eye.  “Aye. And may the change do you good, my dear.  Good luck to you.”

She took the change and wishes gratefully. “Thank you,” she said, “I shall need it.”  Then she smiled a radiant smile.  The car, the faithful steed, moving away from the tollbooth drove off into the distance, into the world of concrete that opened up to swallow the little brave flower.

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6 thoughts on “Tollbooth.

  1. I think its an excellent piece of writing doc. I really liked it. The nothingness of it all. and yet it encapsulated something brilliant… the randomness of it…the conflict that u can’t see but its there …… the mystery of before and what happens after…its a random moment plucked in time …just like the light of a lonely lampost in a dark alley. Kudos

    1. *blushes* i’m sure its not all as great as that. but thank you for the analysis 🙂 i’m glad you liked it. 😀

      flash fiction is mostly meant to be like that, a random moment plucked in time. the rest of the stories are mostly like that too. let’s see if you like those 🙂 the lampost analogy is beautiful btw. ^_^

  2. cute tidbit of writing! liked how the guy was always saying “Aye” lol..he sounds like a desi dude or maybe Australian.. couldn’t tell . but nice

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